Posted by: Reginald Cyntje | December 30, 2009

The Cycle

Acquaintance – Hi, its nice to meet you. Did you enjoy the music? I noticed your intense attention while I was playing. What do you do?

Buildup – its been a while since we’ve been hanging out. The little things you do…Are you trying to charm me? Its working! I get a text in the morning saying hello or a call just to say hi. The more I get to know you the more I like you, trust you. I feel comfortable in your presence. It feels like I’ve known you all my life.

Commitment – wow, I love you. When I think of the future I can’t see it without you. Whatever we do I want to be with you. Understand you. Build a life with you. Home? Kids?

Deterioration – why would you do that? I thought we had something special. I really don’t want to go down this road again. What is happening to our connection? It seems that we don’t understand each other anymore. What happened to effective communication…

We all seem to go through this cycle. Sometimes the deterioration stage lasting longer than it needs to or going back and fourth between deteriorating and committing.

Relationships are complex and require lots of work. Can we diminish our egos?
Our interpersonal relationships determine our success. What is your idea of success? At the core of any relationship there is some form of communication. What if we all focused on positive communication (verbal and nonverbal) in all aspects of our relationships? Can we avoid or minimize the negative? Are we aware of what messages we send out with our actions? Do we allow wisdom to blind us?

Life, Music and Love are based on communication. How effective are you at expressing your thoughts…lovingly?



  1. The question is how effective are YOU in expressing yourself lovingly? I know it must be second nature for you!

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