Posted by: Reginald Cyntje | February 23, 2010

Atonement

To make amends for a wrong?

I sit and reflect on life. You know those mistakes made that don’t sit right within. Did I make a choice that I did not atone for?

I thought the decision made aided in the betterment of life but did I hurt someone in the process. If so, I’m sorry. Is that atonement? Will I make peace with you and/or within?

Do you feel I wronged you in some way but did not apologize? Are you secretly or publicly wishing that I suffer? I assure you that there is no malice in my heart and this is all a misunderstanding. Can you forgive me for the hardship I may have caused?

I wonder if any misfortunes I experienced are due to lack of atonement. Would my life change if I examined the past and fixed all my misguided, poorly calculated decisions? Would that guarantee me a positive future? Is atonement for our conscience, the wronged or the greater good?

I’m an imperfect being. I have made mistakes and will continue to. As I grow and unlearn I do my best to be aware so the lessons don’t intensify. I can’t right every wrong but I can love. I can allow the music in my heart to become my theme music through the pathways of life. Each year provides me an opportunity to upgrade; keep what works and trash or rework the flaws.

Over the course of my life I intend to inspire more people than I hurt. Teach and be humble to learn. When I mess up, I plan to make amends and rebuild. I don’t have the resources to fix everything but each situation provides me with wisdom.

If you know my heart, you know my intent but I can’t always control the impact. I’m here on this planet for a reason. Healer? Father? Musician? Human…I’m a work in progress.

When we are born we are a block of wood. Life allows us to sculpt our masterpiece. The process never easy but worth it. I’m still constructing my masterpiece. Mistakes and misfortunes are all a part of the finished product. I seek wisdom, understanding and peace. Atonement…included

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Responses

  1. As a member of the artist community I know many of us talk a good game but rarely are able to live up to our own credo. Our ability as artist is to create and shape the ideal. But what is the reality ? I seriously do wonder if you plan to live up to anything you have written on this blog or are you simply writing pretty words for others to admire. Every great artist can inspire but only a rare few can inspire their selves to live the lives the create in their art. And really as an artist its not that hard to inspire more people than you hurt. I’m sure Miles Davis inspired more people than he hurt and even perhaps Hitler, simply based on how well the marketed themselves. I know personally for me the most important people I plan to atone my behavior for are the people close to me. Can I be the same person privately as I am publicly ?

    But over all the most important person you have to ask forgiveness from is God…

  2. I do know how much you despise me using scripture but nevertheless I don’t want you thinking you are writing something that hasn’t already been addressed before by men greater than you.

    Psalm 51

    Psalm 51
    For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.

    1 Have mercy on me, O God,
    according to your unfailing love;
    according to your great compassion
    blot out my transgressions.

    2 Wash away all my iniquity
    and cleanse me from my sin.

    3 For I know my transgressions,
    and my sin is always before me.

    4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
    and done what is evil in your sight,
    so that you are proved right when you speak
    and justified when you judge.

    5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
    sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

    6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts [a] ;
    you teach [b] me wisdom in the inmost place.

    7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
    wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

    8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
    let the bones you have crushed rejoice.

    9 Hide your face from my sins
    and blot out all my iniquity.

    10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
    and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

    11 Do not cast me from your presence
    or take your Holy Spirit from me.

    12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
    and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

    13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
    and sinners will turn back to you.

    14 Save me from bloodguilt, O God,
    the God who saves me,
    and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.

    15 O Lord, open my lips,
    and my mouth will declare your praise.

    16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
    you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

    17 The sacrifices of God are [c] a broken spirit;
    a broken and contrite heart,
    O God, you will not despise.

    18 In your good pleasure make Zion prosper;
    build up the walls of Jerusalem.

    19 Then there will be righteous sacrifices,
    whole burnt offerings to delight you;
    then bulls will be offered on your altar.

  3. And just in case you are sincere, stop beating yourself up and I personally extend the same compassionate words Yeshua said to the woman caught in adultery after He stopped others from stoning her “Go and sin no more…you have been forgiven”

    1 John 1:8-10
    8If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.

    No one is righteous no not one Reginald…Moses, Paul, David were all murders and yet God forgave their transgressions because they were humble before Him first and foremost. God always exalt the humble despite their shortcomings. Once we gave our lives to human we are a new creature and all things have passed away. I simply suggest you rededicate your life to Christ and let the blood of the lamb wash you clean so you can forget what is behind you and press on to the mark of a higher calling. Let the former things pass away and stand on the promise of Romans 8:28 “ALL things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” I know without a shadow of a doubt God inspite of ourselves can create beauty from ashes 🙂


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